Sporting Venus

Go Jessica!

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Toxophilite Venus

Triple P was looking for some pictures of lady archers for an Olympic-themed sporting post but chanced upon this fine image.  She is not really a high tech modern lady archer but more like a liberated Maid Marion.  Still, she has a fine natural-looking figure and traditional equipment (so to speak).  She risks getting some nasty wrist burn without a bracer, however.

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Venus on wheels: Nicole Begg

It'll be tricky getting your shorts on now...

One of the biggest frustrations for female sports stars is when a less successful but more attractive competitor gets all the attention and sponsorsip.

The classic example being the attractive (at least as far as tennis players went at the time) but not quite at the top, Anna Kournikova. Her huge sponsorship deals annoyed her fellow players. "Aesthetics and charisma are seen as more important than sporting performance and it won't change as long as the box office puts Kournikova ahead of Lindsay Davenport just because she is prettier," moaned, successful but less well known French player, Natalie Tauziat in 2000. At this point Kournikova was earning £7.5 million a year but less than £500,000 of that was from tennis winnings.

How frustrating then, to be a double world champion and attractive and still not get the sponsorship deals. This was the plight facing nineteen year old New Zealand in-line skater Nicole Begg a couple of years ago. Beggs solution was simple: pose for some pictures wearing her in-line skates and nothing else.

She had done them for a local skating magazine (encouraged, rather creepily, by her coach father Bill) and must have been delighted when the rather modest shots went into orbit and were picked up all around the world, including by Playboy. Begg told her local paper that she had stripped off to lift her international profile and that of her sport: "Lots of sports stars, both male and female, have done this sort of thing before."

Well it certainly worked, and she has a raft of sponsors now, including Kia cars. However, no doubt, as with Victoria Pendleton the cyclist, the "wimmin" in the sport will be bemoaning the fact that this is what it took to get her backing.

She now has five world titles, just missing out in the last World championships in China in October but still winning three bronzes following an injury plagued season.

In fact, looking at some pictures of in-line racing there seen to be quite a few attractive girls in the field. Maybe its something we should see at the Olympics as it seems to be a combination of normal speed skating and road cycling.

So well done Nicole for delivering on your master plan. In truth, she is cute rather than beautiful and her figure isn't exactly world class (unlike her skating) but it just goes to show that the male dominated world of sports sponsoship has such low expectations of the looks of female athletes that someone reasonably attractive can still make an impact based on a few slighly saucy pictures.

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Curling Venus: Claudia Toth

Claudia Toth

Agent Triple P enjoys watching the Winter Olympics much more than the summer games, although for many reasons Vancouver 2010 has not been as satisactory as others he has watched in the past. He should be very involved in the whole thing but isn't somehow. This is odd as he has visted Vancouver and Whistler many times and the only other Winter Olpmpics city he has has been to was Innsbruck. He is very familiar with the locations of the events therefore. He was even involved with VANOC the organising committee for a while on a couple of issues.

Claudia uses a whole body sensing technique to decide where her next stones should be carved from

One big issue is that Vancouver just doesn't look wintry enough. Its nice to see Hazel Irvine giving her updates from the end of Canada Place with the lovely piles of sulphur in the background but it should be snowy mountains and fir trees not ships and float planes!

Claudia and the Austrian curling team: the other babe is her sister

The other problem, of course, is the eight hour time diference. Triple P has missed most of the ski-ing events which are shown early evening UK time. Switching on live, at present, for the late night show it is always curling. Triple P has been to several curling rinks in Canada. It is a very popular sport there. He even had a meeting in the cafe of the curling rink in Maple Ridge, BC once! What he wants to watch is bobsleigh, ski-ing and maybe a few stick-like women (where is the new Katarina Witt?) in short skirts in the figure skating. What he gets is curling. The problem with curling is that it is completely addictive to watch. Triple P has been staying up until 1.30am watching men and women sliding bits of Scottish granite over the ice. I suppose it's one of the few sports where great Britain has any chance of winning a medal: our bob-skeleton lady Amy Williams, being something of a surprise winner. Incidentally, we are sure that at Salt Lake City it was called skeleton-bob but now they have reversed this, presumably so it doesn't sound like a character from Pirates of the Caribbean.

Very much Triple P's sort of woman!

Anyway, back to curling and the rather splendid Claudia Toth captain (or "skip" as we afficionados know it!) of the Austrian team of a few years ago. Sadly, Austria didn't make the curling for this Olympics so we will have to make do with these pictures from a couple of years back. Claudia was the former girlfriend of America's wayward skier, Bode Miller, until he dumped her. Is he insane? Er, well he was the man who went out on a heavy drinking session before the 2006 Olympic downhill race and, not surprisingly, failed to deliver his predicted gold medal.

Claudia gets her rock off

The black and white photos of Claudia are from a women of curling (honestly!) calendar from 2005. Claudia turned down German Playboy, sadly, but she is still a fine looking young lady for some icy sliding fun. She is obviously good with a broom as well, which would be very useful given the state of Agent Triple P's study floor at present.

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Slovenian Venus: Alenka Bikar

Alenka from the front

A long time ago Agent Triple P was not a bad sprinter. OK at 100 metres and 200 meters but Southern Counties standard at 400m. As a result, even though we have largely become disillusioned with athletics due to the inability of the governing body to really root out illegal substances, we do still enjoy watching the sprints at the major Games. We are even contemplating attending the 2012 Olympic sprints in London.

Now we're talking

Attractive (to Agent Triple P anyway) women athletes are rare and are more likely to be found in events like pole vault, high jump and long jump (for some reason). However, a well toned body can (pace Agent DVD) make up for a slightly lower than average scoring face. If that body part is a posterior then we would argue that it can more than make up for it.

On your marks...

No-one demonstrates this more than Slovenian sprinter Alenka Bikar. She is pretty short for a sprinter at just 5'4". Now 34, she was born in Ljubljana, a city Triple P has visited several times and one where he can vouch for the attractiveness of the women. Not quite World class (unlike, say, Agent Triple P's favourite Merlene Ottey) nevertheless between 1997 and 2005 she got some pretty good results: Silver for the 200m at the European Indoor Championship in 2000, 6th in the Indoor and Outdoor World Championships the following year and, her only international title, gold in the 200 at the 2005 Mediterranean Games.

But it is Alenka's posterior rather than her sporting achievements whch we celebrate today. Quite simply she has one of the best rears we have ever seen in track and field.

Alenka Wiggles

This did not go unnoticed by bored stadium cameramen; as the above clip delightfully demonstrates.

So we wish Alenka a happy birthday for this Thursday and may she wiggle for many years.

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Cycling Venus: Victoria Pendleton

Victoria Pendleton: goes like a bomb

You could hardly open a paper or magazine or look at the TV recently without gazing upon the lovely face of Britain's Olympic Gold medal winning sprint cyclist, the splendid Victoria Pendleton (even her name has a wonderful ring to it!).

Victoria and Elle MacPherson promote the Skyride. Very "A" list!

Whether promoting a London charity bike ride, a new fitness game for the Wii (such a silly name), appearing in FHM or turning up as a celebrity guest of the Brawn Formula 1 team at the British Grand Prix last month Miss Pendleton has been everywhere.

Victoria and Alesha have a Wii together

Victoria Pendleton at the British Grand Prix

It took Agent DVD several seconds to realise that there was also a girl in the picture

We have to thank Agent DVD for first sending us a picture of the lovely seven times World Champion sprinter, looking lovely in an evening dress.

"Would you like me to adjust your nuts?"

Victoria has admitted being a girly girl who likes to dress up and loook good and since becoming well known she has been sought out by photographers to model in something other than lycra.

However, she says she will never be much of a model as she has so many scars it takes a huge amount of digital touching up to make her look respectable.

Girl next door. If only.

Ignoring the fact that digitally touching up Victoria would not be that much of a hardship others obviously still feel that it is worth the effort.

Cover girl

Notably FHM, who featured her on their cover and inside last month, although reputedly Victoria wasn't paid a penny for the shoot whech seems rather mean of them.

Oh my goodness, you could crack walnuts with those!

This, needless to say has not gone down well with the grungier cycling activist end of the bike community. Particularly the women who seem very "disappointed" that she has had to sell out to the likes of FHM and can only promote herself on her looks. Oh dear, welcome to the world.

Victoria, at just 5'5" tall is very petite for a track sprinter and makes some pointed comments about the suspciously masculine attributes of some of her rivals.






She is now sought after for advertising work so we hope she makes a lot of money!

We wouldn't bet against her turning up at the Tour de France at some point over the next three weeks either!

She can lift twice her body weight!



A genuine golden girl!

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Sporting Venus: Alexandra Worisch

This splendid photograph by Tony Duffy has been much imitated since he took it during the European Swimming Championships in Split, Yugoslavia, in 1981.

5'5" Alexandra was competing in the synchronised solo event and finished in silver medal position behind Britain's Carolyn Wilson. At this point Great Britain did well at synchronised swimming but, typically, once it became an Olympic event (like Ice Dancing) we immediately became useless at it.

Alexandra was only fifteen at the time of the photo and went on to compete for Austria in the first Olympic synchronised swimming event at the Los Angeles games where she came tenth in both the solo and duet events.

A very animated Venus rising from the waves! She now works as a physiotherapist for the Austrian Institute for medical and sports scientific advice.

Alexandra today

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